RealTalk

Alright.. the moment we have been waiting for, or well, the moment I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR. the topic of this blog is.. *drum roll*....

... the BOOTY CALL. ready? safety first, so buckle up.

Caution: this will be long, but I PROMISE each line is as important as the next..

So I did my homework and spent some time doing research on this topic since I have no experience in this field. What I have found is a lot of Rules and Regulations, which is important when taking on a booty call. But for us "noobs" out there, there was not very much information on Establishing a Booty Call. Therefore I have decided to dedicate this to the establishment. Now first, here are a few links that might help those in need of rules and regulations, and that I thought were actually a good and quick read..

- http://www.sosuave.com/halloffame/hall226.htm [for the guys]
- http://www.baddgrrl.com/bootycall.html [when to make it, when to take it]
- http://vixentales.blogspot.com/2005/08/booty-calls.html [for the women]
- http://mo.tribe.net/thread/26930c81-2b9c-4cbf-b3e8-c0e7ab67d2f7 [agreement form]

Now, although those are some good reads, I do have some opinions about a few things and will address them later.

Okay, so the real reason no one has talked about yet: The Establishment. now this information is merely based on perspective and personal opinion. NOT FACT. but comments are MORE THAN WELCOME :)

So to establish a booty call, I feel that starting with someone you know is probably a safe bet for the first round. Like any "relationship," I feel it is better to start with someone you are comfortable with and then move on to people you have just met, not literally just met of course. Why? You know how they are, you know they're history [sorta], and HOPEFULLY feel comfortable with their company. CAUTION: dealing with friends is risky also because if for some reason, which there should be no reason, feelings come into play, CUT IT OFF IMMEDIATELY. you should either establish that before or on your way to establishing the booty call.

Now, how do you ask? *whew* this one here is tough.. you obviously don't want to sound desperate, nor do I. There really is no easy way to do it, but to just come out and say it. Yeah I know, that's tough.. but hey, not everything in life is easy, right? I don't mean to literally just ask "So.. you wanna fuck?".. some may be okay with that, but it's hard to know if that's what they want as well. I suggest a quick meeting, say.. an afternoon snack at Starbucks or something. Now that does go against the rule of "keeping booty calls unplanned [see: backup plan]" because according to booty call rules, NO PLANS MADE IN ADVANCE.. meaning you meet, you fuck, you leave. simple as that. But I think establishing the FIRST call like this is probably the polite way to do it, making it short and simple also, typically with a normal opener ["how'd your day go so far..?"], also try and find out if they are in a relationship at the time, because you probably wouldn't want to intrude. Then move into the real reason you wanted to meet up..

"So I wanted to meet up with you to ask you something. You know I'm single, and I know you're single, and if you don't have any plans tonight, I was wondering if i could call you some time to come over and keep me company for a bit."

... now a line like this is good, because it states somewhat clearly what you are implying. If you are more comfortable with them, you can probably figure out an easier way than that, but I would go with something around that line. ALSO, that might be a good time to let them know..

"It's not that I'm romantically attracted to you, no offense, but I just enjoy your company and feel that you might be in the same headspace I'm in, and thought we might be able to help each other out."

[wow, am I really saying these things?! note to self: take notes from self.]

That right there should help clear the idea that this is the beginning of a BOOTY CALL. If they are that dumb to not figure that out, let them know. It is NOT WISE to go into a booty call without clearly stating it's a booty call. If you feel that it's not clear, but they still say yes, bring it up when they come over.. "You do understand that affection and feelings stay outside this room, right? this is just a booty call".. thats when you hand them the AGREEMENT FORM. haha..

From my perspective, I think that's probably the easiest, most polite way you can probably do it. Now, if a meeting isn't possible, I believe its A-OK to do it over the phone [texting, too]. Before meeting up, be somewhat sure that the callee [the person you ask] is looking for what you are looking for, in order to avoid rejection, if that is what you are most afraid of. If you're looking for some "booty" and they are too, chances are its a done deal. After the first night, it's all in your hands now, I'm only here to help establish. Like any other relationship, COMMUNICATION is ideal. MAKE SURE all rules and regulations are known between both parties. THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT. Of course changing rules is okay, as long as you both understand, which is my next subject.

Marc-James' Alterations to Rules and Regulations:
1. Sleeping over is a No No. With this, I think it should be okay, for the first time. First time is the worst time, so I think its neccessary to get used to the idea of having that person in the bed. BUT, that does not mean sleeping over is OK all the time. "Guest" should not sleep over unless asked by "Home Owner" or if it is welcomed.

2. No meeting in public. This rule is according to your preference. If it's a friend at first, that may be difficult. but later on, I suggest talking to one another about this is more polite.

3. No calls before 9pm. Booty calls are supposed to be after 9, but shit, if you want some during the day, and they can be there.. by all means!

4. No calling eachother friends. This is probably for the experienced booty calls. You know, when a booty call merely is JUST a sex buddy to you. I don't know but for me right now, it's kinda hard to get that through my head that I have someone who's not a friend, but just a piece of ass. But like I said, I'm new at this.

5. Doggy style preferred. This is interesting.. you know, so you don't make eye contact n' shit.. although I like this idea *wink* *wink*, any position is fair game as long as the lights are out.

So there you have it! REMEMBER, this is from MY perspective. I may edit this the next week or so, after comments and questions have been taken into account. I just wanted to get this out now because this topic has been up for grabs and everyone has been picking at it. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE leave feedback. AND, if you are interested in a booty call, my email is a click away ;) I'm not gonna lie, I'm single and I'm human.. HOLLA!

ps: If you get some after reading this, you owe me.

[marc]