RealTalk

Asking for too much?!

2009-07-08T16:37:00.000-07:00

Woot Wooooot! Here we go again ladies and gents, its that time of the year again. Everyone has been doing their own thing lately and not much REAL TALK has been discussed. It seems most of our questions have been answered already and since this site hasn't been updated lately, I'm guessing everyones been doing pretty good with the "love life," yes-no? Well, let me get everyone up to date here on my "status"..

I have been in a relationship for "over a year" (in quotes because it wasnt technically OFFICIAL until november.. blah blah blah, but we started seeing eachother last May '08) and things are good as usual. We have the little fights normal couples have every now and then, but we learn from them and move on. Because we live so close to eachother, we spend A LOT of time together. If I'm not working, in class or hanging out with the guys (NGA nite, no girls allowed nite :D), I'm with her, unless we both decide we need some time away from eachother but that doesn't happen very often.

The reason I have jump-started this site again is for one particular question, but I've come up with another (and maybe a few more if I can think of them) just now. So the first question:
We might have mentioned this earlier, too lazy to scroll around and find it.. but What makes two people an "official" couple? Does the guy seriously HAVE to ask the girl

"Will you be my girlfriend?"

"Can we be boyfriend and girlfriend now?"

I thought that stuff stays in junior/high school. I'm asking because when we first started "dating", everyone was all "Are you guys official?!" or "Are you bf & gf now?!" blah blah blah.. Does there still need to be a SPECIFIC DATE as to when things started? I guess anniversary wise it makes sense, but I just hated getting bombarded by these silly questions of putting an exact date on everything. Almost pressured into a relationship.. what do you think?

Second Question (main question):
Im in a relationship, but I am young still (24 is young still!!! shut up you people in your Jordan year!). Eventually in my life when I am fully done with school (maybe even sooner, I dont know really) and just working to make a career, I want some time alone.. meaning my "bachelor time" but that doesnt mean im going to go around and sleep with random girls, I just dont want to be "tied down" in a sense, I want to be able to go out whenever I want, have friends over, talk to anyone I want, and if one chat leads to another, then so be it. BUT! Again, I am NOT doing this to just sleep with other women. I just dont want that "tied down" feeling. I'll be done with school, working on a career, starting the next chapter in my life, and I just want to start out fresh. Is it horrible of me to just leave the relationship I am in to have "my time" or is it ok? I mentioned it to her awhile back and she understood, but of course women say that and could mean something else.

So lemme know what you guys think. Hope everyone is doing alright with life!

the "let go"

2009-02-01T22:29:00.000-08:00

have you "let go" or been "let go"? what did you say? or what did they say to you? ca'mon...time for sharing! worst let go's or wtf?! let go's.

Hoh boy!

2009-01-26T22:19:00.001-08:00

Can you believe it's been over a yeeeaaarrr?? I guess so. Anyway, Steph is flying out again this year guys! March! Shall we make another trip to Canada?? Haha.. yeah we should regardless, but yep. Should be fun times as always.

So I've been meaning to read this book, He's Just Not That Into You. The book is a couple years old but I finally came around to reading it [movie coming out in Feb] and BOY do I have a lot to talk about, lol. Hopefully you guys still check on this from time to time - I think we'd have some pretty good discussion on some of the topics.

I'm interested in how the movie is going to turn out because the book is kind of like a Q&A format. Time to hit the theaters with the girl friends!

Hilarious

2008-12-29T23:32:00.000-08:00

Should I feel bad or not?

one version of "the talk"

2008-12-14T11:49:00.000-08:00

the picture: so you've been casually someone for some number of months. good sex, good conversation, good company, good laughs...but you have no idea if it's exclusive. part of you doesn't want to be exclusive or dive into it being a relationship because it just seems like putting a label on it would make it that much more restrictive. i mean, we all have issues with commitment but for him/her, you've been considering letting the single life go or at least seeing how far it can go.

anyway, question is: how do you bring up "the talk" without it being so (dun dun dun) "THE TALK"?

be selfish.

2008-12-14T11:32:00.000-08:00

why is it that we want those we cannot have? and those who want us, we don't want? i can rant and rave all i want but i'd like to hear your opinions.

Have you ever..

2008-11-30T18:33:00.000-08:00

been on a dick or had wood so swole that you felt like you could do this?

A simple yes or no will do.

how...

2008-11-03T20:14:00.001-08:00

did we ever stop going on this blog?

necessary

2008-09-13T19:27:00.000-07:00

how do you ask someone you're dating if they're "clean" or have been tested? i mean, it is important. it shouldn't really distort your feelings towards them unless, of course, they had something. but i mean do you want to know? or you don't want to know but should know?

serioussssssss topic. but it came up one day. thoughts?

Question!

2008-08-28T22:22:00.000-07:00

Wow guys, we've been laggin' on this..

Question that came up last night while the dudes, Sam, & I were at Fusion. Hahah.. we were "people watching" -- well, more like watching people dance and the question came up.. [which I think we might've brought up before but I'll ask anyways]

if someone doesn't have "rhythm" -- aka can't really dance -- does that mean that they're bad in bed?

P.S.
I miss Vegas!

Vegas Video Dos

2008-08-06T15:07:00.001-07:00

SeaCal Does Vegas: The Contest from ABueno on Vimeo.

Vegas Video Uno

2008-07-30T22:38:00.000-07:00

SeaCal Does Vegas: Post Poetry from ABueno on Vimeo.

Let me introduce....

2008-07-20T11:29:00.000-07:00

to you, the crew of the LV weekend. Enjoy! And, please, send resumes and applications for review to stephaniecaragan@gmail.com. HAHAHAHAHAHA, yes, i was THAT bored.

Sheena

22, female, SINGLE, got skin as white as milk and does your body good. real good.

Faith

22, female, TAKEN, 'nough said. take a look, but please do not touch.

Jenna

22, female, SINGLE, she got a degree, care to see?

Samantha

22, female, SINGLE, if you look mexican because you're half white and half filipino or just simply look hispanic, please send an application this way.

Stephanie

22, female, SINGLE, if you're not black, please fall out of line.

Jean

22, female, SINGLE, beauty and brains. whaaaaat?

Marc

23, male, SINGLE, the quote he goes by: "without me, it'd just be aweso".

Andrew

23, male, SINGLE, his opening introduction: "i'm dope."

Mikey

21, male, SINGLE, do you have chinese inside you? would you like some?

Hourt

22, male, SINGLE, future rainmaker... you might as well call him Mr.Tan.

Marc

22, male, TAKEN, black man stuck in a filipino dude's body.

Carl

22, male, SINGLE, want him to be your nurse, ladies? he could patch you up.

LV

2008-07-19T15:03:00.000-07:00

In 5 days !!!!!

:) !!!

Las Vegas 2008

2008-06-24T18:20:00.000-07:00

planet hollywood's nichtclub

the mirage's nightclub.

July 24-28

Ladies:
Sheena
Steph
Faith
Jenna
Sam
Jean

Guys:
Andrew
Mike
MJ
Hourt
Marc

Staying at: Polo Towers (in between Planet Hollywood and MGM Grand)

Hahah

2008-06-06T13:37:00.000-07:00

I just noticed on our list of songs.. we have "Adina Howard - T-Shit and My Panties On " hahaaha

Also wanted to share this hilarious video if you didn't see it on my myspace.

Happy Friday!!

you know what i think?

2008-06-01T02:02:00.000-07:00

i think we've been talking about relationships and dating for too long now. we need a break. we're single and should embrace it. yea yea, there will be time to meet someone... but for the meantime... let's enjoy the art of not having to deal with petty fights, routine calls to "see what (they or you) are doing", having to make your schedule to what best fits with them, and whatever you would like to add. anybody want to list of things they DON'T MISS about relationships? and what they love about being single? hahaha. i just thought we'd change it up a bit. i'm not bitter, i'm just thinking about VEGAS. well kinda. tonight i was at a friend's graduation party and overheard some couple argue about something really small. there was also a couple in which the girlfriend was following him around EVERYWHERE. he was talking to me for a bit and then she pops out of nowhere. she knew people there but it was like a leech. yikes. anyways, HAPPY JUNE everybody!

Ouch

2008-05-04T22:07:00.000-07:00

I meant to post this earlier but.... anyway.

So.. saaay that you met somebody new and starting hanging out with 'em. Although you've been talking about meeting someone new to "date", you're not particularly interested in dating the person, but that person is interested in you and wants to get to know you better.

"Getting to know you.." is that considered dating someone?

You know it would be cool if you ended up liking the person [especially when you least expect it] but what happens when you end up not liking the person at all.. what do you say? How do you end it?

Ooowww...

banner for us

2008-04-27T02:41:00.000-07:00

because i was bored.

which one are you?

2008-04-26T20:19:00.000-07:00

there are two different ways to approach a prospect:

be the pursuer or be the pursued.

it's typical to say that guys are/should be the pursuer to tag onto the "chivalry" aspect of relationships, true. and it's also typical to say that the ladies are to be the pursued. in few cases, ladies get ahead of the game and guys kick back in which i would like to say that "the tables are turned". yes, in these few cases, ladies become the pursuers and the guys become the pursued. i'm not too sure if this is a good thing because it can be for the guys, but also it gives ladies a taste of what the guys have to go through when they find a special lady that shines brighter than the rest.

may i open up to you, my fellow realtalk-ers? because i'm going to anyways. many times i've found myself to be the pursuer and i'm not too sure why, but i can list a few reasons that i think can best answer that question. i have hung around older friends and guy friends to grasp onto the "go get it" mentality. when i see something i like or want, i'll do my best to get it. don't get me wrong, i didn't mean "i get whatever i want" because that's not the case. so please don't mistake me for having that type of idea about myself.

i've met a guy who has sparked my interest. i just recently went on a date with him. he's a nice guy and there's no "BUT" to go along to that tagline. i want to get to know him more and go on another date. i was told to let the guy be the pursuer this time because my aggressiveness needs to take a back seat and i deserve to be pursued. this, my friends, is where it's difficult. i'm interested in this guy but he needs to step his game up and whisper into my ear and tell me sweet nothings already. hahaha, yes, i don't play. and you all know that.

so another question is, should i just let this MVP on my team play however he feels like or coach him? hahaha you like that?

btw, i miss you guys.

Whaddaya say?

2008-04-24T01:19:00.000-07:00

Picture this..

You're sitting at a dinner table with your best bud [guys with close guy friend, ladies with close lady friend], and a set of two other people of the opposite gender whom you just met, and are getting to know. Everyone is hitting it off. The night is going good, everyone is enjoying themselves and the conversations are being carried out with ease. You and the bud leave the table to use the restroom together [yes, guys.. just this once, pretend we go together]. What goes on in the next 5 minutes during this distance is a to be considered one of the great wonders you'll never know. The women will evaluate the men, while the men evaluate the women as well. But when both parties join back together, not one word of the two discussions are every brought up, yet only sneaky giggles and smirks here and there.

So here is my question.. WHAT DO THEY SAY WHEN WE'RE NOT AROUND??? the above situation is the first setting, seeing that many of us may be able to relate to that situation SOME DAY during our bachelor/ette time in life. Many other situations can be used. For example..

for the ladies..
- Man asks you out on a date. You say yes. You go home.. scratch that, you make it to the car before you pick up your phone and call your BFF. WHAT DO YOU SAY WHEN WE'RE NOT AROUND?
- You see a good looking guy, but don't have the courage to say something.. WHAT ARE YOU TEXTING YOUR BFF WHEN WE'RE NOT AROUND?

guys..
- Beautiful women walks by, gives you a longer-than-normal glance and smiles. WHAT ARE YOU THINKING? OR TELLING YOUR BUD NEXT TO YOU?
- Good looking lady is eyeing you down. You want to ask her for her name/a dance/number/some quality time.. WHAT'S YOUR THOUGHT PROCESS?

I bring this topic up because I thought it would open up our minds as to what the other gender is thinking when you make an impression on them. post up the setting/situation with your answers, please.

To conclude on a funnier note, here's a few from Overheard In New York ..
Hot southern girl #1: So, before I came up here my mom is like, "Be very careful around those northern boys, they think all southern girls just love to cook and f*ck."
Hot southern girl #2: Oh my gosh, are you serious? They think that? That's so messed up!
Hot southern girl #1: I know!
Hot southern girl #2: But I really do love to cook... And f*ck.
Hot southern girl #1: I know... Me too.
[Overheard in the Union Square Cafe, NYC]

Woman #1: It's really small, you know, but the sex is wonderful.
Woman #2: You mean he's rich?
Woman #1: Yeah. Exactly.
[Overheard at Union Square]

[marc]

"you're on my mind, you're on my mind"

2008-04-14T13:46:00.000-07:00

a little throwback. this was America's Best Dance Crew back in 1995

they're coming back this year

----

anyone have any questions to put up? i'll have one tomorrow

Damn Keri

2008-04-07T17:19:00.000-07:00

I didn't know she could get down like that.

She looks Gooooood.

It's a shame with all those reports about Tameka ruining the experience on the set. Usher dude- you fucked up.

"strobe lights make everything sexy.."

2008-03-31T14:29:00.000-07:00

an addition to the list. i like the video too.

sexy song.

A couple perspectives...

2008-03-20T23:25:00.002-07:00

For the ladies...

The Sad Truth About Relationships

For the guys...

Boyfriends I Have Been

Enjoy, my loves!

Random

2008-03-19T00:28:00.000-07:00

Quick break from studying....

Vegas this summer? :)

this "friend ladder" needs to be burned

2008-03-17T00:43:00.000-07:00

let me get this straight... the WORST thing a guy could hear from a girl that he likes and has befriended is:

-i love you...like a brother!
-who, him? oh, he's just a friend.
-he's such a nice guy, but...
-he's too nice.
-i can't date him, i'd break his heart.
(Please, feel free to join in and add anymore that I have missed.)

yeah yeah yeah... well, you know what, guys? girls get it, too! However, we hear:

-she's one of the guys.
-who, her? she's just a friend.
-(insert name here)'s like my sister.
-pfft. no, we're JUST friends.
-(when a friend asks, "is she your girlfriend?") he replies: us? it's not even like that!
(Please, feel free to join in and add anymore that I have missed.)

And... the discussion begins here.
-

honestly is the number one...

2008-03-07T14:23:00.001-08:00

I randomly came up with this question.. I don't know if it's actually happened to someone but I'd want your guys thoughts and inputs on it.

For the ladies...
lets say you have a boyfriend and his close friend that he used to like before just broke up with her boyfriend.. you know about their past and how he was crushing for awhile.. the close friend asks him to go out and you're ok with him going.. the close friend gets really drunk.. since she's drunk.. she ends up kissing him.. he pulls back though and he tells you what happened.. what do you do?

For the gentlemen...
lets say you have a girlfriend and your close friend who you used to like before.. for a very long time just broke up with her boyfriend.. your GF knows about your guys past and how you were crushing on her for awhile.. your close friend asks you to go out and your GF is ok with you going.. your close friend gets really drunk.. and since she super drunk.. she ends up kissing you.. you pull back though.. do you still tell your girlfriend what happened?

I wanna see them answers !

----

she totally said: so i have a question.
go dru go: i may have an answer.
she totally said: lets say you have a GF
go dru go: thanks for reminding me.
she totally said: and your close friend who you used to like before.. for a very long time just broke up with her boyfriend.. your GF knows about your guys past and how you were crushing on her hard.. your close friend asks you to go out and your GF is ok with you going.. your close friend gets super drunk.. since she super drunk.. she ends up kissing you.. you pull back though
she totally said: do you still tell your GF what happened?
go dru go: no
she totally said: lol sorry for the reminder
go dru go: hahaha.. all good
go dru go: but no i wouldn't
she totally said: your reason
go dru go: well she wasn't herself. i constrained myself.
go dru go: simple mistake.
go dru go: no need to create a bigger rift between my "girlfriend" and the kisser
go dru go: nothing's coming out of it
go dru go: i did my part, stayed true and didn't kiss back
go dru go: even tho i might've wanted to
go dru go: =-O
she totally said: ass
she totally said: haha
go dru go: what?
she totally said: good reasoning though
go dru go: haha.. REAL TALK!

...

go dru go: well.. so would you WANT to know if [if you were the girlfriend and] she kissed him?
she totally said: i would
she totally said: if that did happen.. and it was an honest mistake.. then i would expect her to be the one to apologize to me
go dru go: ooh
go dru go: tou che
she totally said: without the apology.. i might be shady around her.. because i let him go with her respecting their friendship.. were for her.. she would have to respect my relationship
go dru go: word
go dru go: good shit

FIST is up!

2008-02-27T23:56:00.000-08:00

i got linked to this video because a few of my friends at school are a part of a group called Hip Hop Congress at Cal State Fullerton and are trying to get this duo to perform at our school. I found this interesting and thought maybe it'd be something different to watch for you guys.

Attn: Nice Guys

2008-02-27T14:21:00.001-08:00

First things first, I wanna share this with ya'll. I got lost in YouTube a few days ago.. You guys have to watch this video on Cooking Adobo - it's freakin' hilarious [if you understand Tagalog/Filipino culture].

Anyway, this post is for all you NG's out there.. NG=Nice Guy. Not sure if any of you have already seen these, but I found a pretty interesting story created by a group of guys (Wong Fu Productions) about Nice Guys. Ahh yeah, the guy that we ladies tend to over see -- unintentionally of course! It has 3 videos to it, kinda long but not reaaallly... c'mon you're not really doing anything anyways right? :) So here's something to ponder: do nice guys finish last?

Check it out...

Part One: The Problem

Part Two: The Lesson

Part Three: The Risk

Ladies -- have you ever used that "excuse" on not dating or giving a guy a chance because he's a nice guy? "It's like dating my brother", "he's too sweet for me anyways" -- isn't that what "we" want? A sweet guy. There's no such thing as being too sweet, right?

Fellas -- do you really think that girls like jerks? Is chivalry really dead? I wanna know what you guys think about this.. as I'm sure you may or may not have a lot to say about it.

Let's have fun with this guys haha. On a less "serious" video - check this one out, by the same dudes -- on white guys getting asian girls, hahaha Yellow Fever and their bloopers. Good shit.

Hope everyone is having a good week so far.. happy hump day, btw. Love ya'll :)

busy?

2008-02-21T01:17:00.001-08:00

i hope everyone's not too busy for another set of questions?! i'm sure you all have noticed how we have been neglecting our Real Talk sessions. With that said, here are the questions!

1. What "line" would you accept if a person from the opposite sex were to approach you? (sky's the limit, so please list as many as you can)

2. What lines would you NOT consider acceptable if approached by the opposite sex? (Generally, for the ladies, what horrible lines have been used on you?)

3. If you were approached by the opposite sex and after they introduced themselves he/or she offered you their number, would you:

a.take it
b.take it and hand him/her yours
c.none of the above

4. You're in the get-to-know stage of conversing with a prospect. Somehow, their roster (ppl they've slept with) has come into par and the number is significantly higher than yours. What are your thoughts?

5. What are you a sucker for when it comes to the opposite sex? (e.g. something about them, something they wear, or something they do that makes you attracted to them)

There. That'll keep you guys busy. Please contact me if you have a question about my questions. Also, please listen to "Make Love in this Club" by Usher. It's my new BED song. AND another few notes, Erykah Badu's album New Amerykah comes out Tuesday, Feb. 26 and Usher's album comes out either in March or May; get 'em! Be on the look out for Musiq Soulchild's new album and Common's new album this year! And, that was definitely a plug. I'm also doing a Snapple ad campaign and I may need some of your help.

Alright, well... (clapping hands together) Do work, homeskillets!

Happy Valentines

2008-02-14T14:42:00.000-08:00

for you all:

AB's Valentines Day Mix

Happy Valentine's Day my loves!

2008-02-14T00:51:00.000-08:00

If you girls bake, which you probably will....

Get your cupcake on with this list...

TRACKLIST:
1. Tony Toni Tone - Just me & you
2. Troop - I will always love you
3. Anquette - I will always be there for you
4. Monica - Why I love you so much
5. Puff Johnson - Forever more
6. Bobby Brown - Rock Witcha
7. Chris Deburgh - Lady in red
8. Klymaxx - Id still say yes
9. The Jets - Same love
10. Ben B. Hard - Special
11. Pussycat Dolls - Stick wid u
12. Jasmine Guy - Just wanna hold u
13. S.O.S. Band - Tell me if you still care
14. Bow Wow/Ciara - Like you
15. Doc Box & B. Fresh - Slow Love
16. Kwame - Sweet thing
17. Roger - I wanna be your man
18. Sade - By your side (Neptunes remix)
19. Faith Evans - I love you
20. The Isley Bros. Between the sheets
21. The Deele - Two Occasions
22. Keith Sweat - Twisted
23. Paula Abdul - Rush Rush
24. Force MD's - Love is a house
25. Ne-Yo/ Candice Jones - Sexy Love
26. Monet - Leave the lights on

How Far Would You Go?

2008-02-13T16:22:00.000-08:00

Okay everyone! So..I'm officially on this (thanks to Sheena). Yay! I'm excited. So..more hypothetical questions of course. I already asked Marc and Dru this but the first is

- If a guy/girl has a history of cheating, many times or just once, do you give him/her a chance?

And my new question is..how far would you go to get some ass? haha..yeah I asked. What is your limit? A 2-hour drive? An hour-long ferry ride? Is there a specific distance where you say "That's just ridiculous!"? (okay..that was like 5 questions)

This is regarding someone who is single and available..not someone who is going to visit their significant other..

Numbers would be nice..

By The Way..

2008-02-13T15:23:00.001-08:00

Did I mention how awesome my cousin is? I know ya'll love her but not as much as I dooo do! Look what WE got at our door today! :)

Along with the sunshine we have today, this totally made my day.. thanks cuuuh! <3

V-Day.

2008-02-13T10:57:00.000-08:00

I thought this was funny - it's from PostSecret.

I'm sure you boys would like that a lot eh? Anyways, I just wanted to ask the question on how everybody feels about Valentine's Day - since it IS tomorrow. There are actually two things that are going on tomorrow. Cupid is hittin people in the ass cheeks with their arrows and people are celebrating V-DAY.

We all know that this "holiday" - St. Valentine's Day is a day used to express one's love for another by bringing flowers, making cards, making boxes to put the cards in, giving candy, going out to dinner, etc. etc. - all that good stuff. I found that the history of Valentine's day to be interesting in that it is named after a martyr. Don't get me wrong though - I'm a total hopeless romantic and I'm all about that 'lovey dovey' stuff [not all the time though] and I'm not feeling at all 'bitter' about this 'holiday' - but expressing one's love for someone else is something that should happen all the time; maybe not with flowers & candy all the time but by the little things. C'mon, I know you 10% know what I'm talkin about - at least I hope you'd have an idea. :)

But since I am currently not in a relationship, this year Valentine's day is going to be called 'Single Awareness Day', hahahaha (Jae!) and I'll be celebrating V-Day. :)

From Wikipedia; "V-Day is a movement to end violence against women and girls inspired by Eve Ensler's play, "The Vagina Monologues." The movement was started in the late 1990s by author, playwright and activist, Eve Ensler. Ensler has been quoted as saying that it was women's reactions to the play that launched V-Day. After seeing "The Vagina Monologues," women would line up after to tell Eve their personal experiences, most often of sexual violence. ()"

Vagina Monologues.. how awesome. Sorta, not really.

Foreal though, power to the clean vajayjays!! Hahahah

I hope all you love birds out there have fun tomorrow..&better be gettin' some! Haha

Additions

2008-02-11T02:46:00.000-08:00

a picture for the ladies (steph- i see you)

(Untitled) How Does It Feel? // D'Angelo
7 Days // Craig David
Sexy // Black Eyed Peas

less about sex, more about astrology... for now

2008-02-11T02:39:00.000-08:00

Virgo: The Selective One
Virgo can shut himself off from the world, but most of the time he seems outgoing and friendly. Though his quick, funny comebacks aren't meant to hurt, these comments can sometimes be construed as sarcastic or biting. Don't read too much into it. Virgo is more likely to mock himself than to put the joke on you. In fact, Virgo's worst enemy is himself. He has to be especially careful to treat himself well and not to wander down the path of self-pity. True, he bounces back quickly, and chances are good that you won't have to see his super ego-sensitive side. He'll just disappear when he's angry. Also, Virgo is apt to keep his self-perceived faults under wraps.

Sagittarius: The Renaissance Man (or Woman)
Learning something new is like breathing. She craves adventure and intense experiences. Buy here's the paradox. She may want to skydive, sail, learn foreign languages, conquer new worlds, yet all the while she's looking for a partner who's something of an opposing force--one who will balance her out. In other words, Sagittarius wants to shine, and she needs someone who'll let her, who'll come along for the ride of a lifetime and stand next to her with a quiet strength. The perfect Sag partner has to be a tough cookie, laugh at all her jokes, and have fun with her. For Sag, a boring life with her work or with a love partner is like not living at all.

Leo: The Generous Lion
There's almost no one as generous as Leo the Lion. In fact, she's much more comfortable giving than getting. The Lion will also spend when she has the chance, buying gifts for herself and for others without waiting for a holiday or any specific reason. Returning the favor with a gift will be nice for Leo, and she'll probably adore you for it. However, the one thing that she wants more than anything is your appreciation and devotion. She needs to be respected and admired. In fact, she'll gravitate toward you if you can give her this without ceremony.

Cancer: The Expansive Heart
Cancer has so much to give. Truly, she's got a heart of gold. She's also surprisingly outgoing and independent-- and she's able to show the world what she's made of. In fact, she's definitely not the wallflower some astrologers make her out to be! She's a cardinal sign-- meaning, of course, that she secretly likes to dominate. In other words, you won't see Cancer bowing to another sign. She's regal. She knows how to turn things around to her advantage. Cancer has the world at her fingertips. How she chooses to use this awesome power depends on her.

Gemini: The Born Storyteller
No one can tell a story like a Gemini. She'll have everyone in the room hanging on every word. Of course, every tale is a little bit better when it's changed, exaggerated, and embellished. Actually, it may just be complete blarney. But that's okay. That's what's expected from Gemini. It's part of her charm. Gemini can easily charm people of the opposite sex, true. She gets bored easily. She changes her mind constantly and expects you to keep up. She also get distracted when the conversation doesn't revolve around something she's interested in. Gemini also forgives and forgets faster than any other sign. No one is ever bored with the erratic Twin.

This is how [you] do it (c) Montell Jordan

2008-02-08T08:02:00.000-08:00

props to Zilla Says.

WARNING:
Not Family/Work Safe (so much that I won't embed these, but check them out on your own nonetheless)

"Dancing" (Is that what we call this?) to Keith Sweat's "Nobody"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lD00Ax3b9VU&NR=1

The Tag Team
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HY0PWFEqXDY

^ There's this sexy transition. Ooh.

The question is... Ladies, who wants to practice?

A Day Late But...

2008-02-05T22:13:00.000-08:00

A random quote from my "Why Do Men Have Nipples?" page-a-day calendar that might make some of you laugh.. especially if you've been working out lately.. ;)

*In case you can't read who the quote is by
- Marty Liquori, a famous miler, on why it's better to abstain from sex before an important race.

Foreal though, who runs a 3:47 mile? Gah damn!

Polls

2008-02-03T14:00:00.000-08:00

**UPDATE 20080204**
I changed the poll already!

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As you can see above, I've added a poll for ourselves and our readers.

For this week I put up a question we've already discussed, but I'd like to see the outcome with an anonymous public.

If you have any other ideas for future polls, post to comments!

----

and here's an interesting article: The Measure of Asian Beauty

a booty call gone wrong...

2008-02-02T15:18:00.000-08:00

Calling All Booties..?

2008-02-02T00:32:00.000-08:00

Alright, so I didn't even bother to Google or Wikipedia the subject at hand because ya'll have already put that shit down clearly. So let me get this right; no public meetings, no "dates", no sleep overs, be open & know that there is nothing else to it except sex, no calls before 9pm.. etc, etc. The thing that I thought was pretty interesting was that "doggie style" was preferred. That's fucked up, hahahha but I could see how that would make a lot more sense. Not saying that I wouldn't enjoy it though.. but I'm also not saying that that's my favorite position either... ookaaaaaaay I probably shouldn't have said any of that, hahahah oh well. :)

Anyway, I'm not sure if I might've passed this up, but it is definately a 'no-no' when it comes to friends and booty calls, right? I think that would be kinda awkward anyways. And also, I imagine that people would prefer that their booty call(s) are with people they don't always see or even hang out, or even some random person they had just met. Since it's part of the "rules" that you aren't allowed to ask how many people they've been with, how are you gonna know that they don't have an STD or something? Yeah, you had better be safe and wrap up all that, but if something were to go down.. oooooo wee, you're screwed.

So that is my really short intake on booty calls. Thanks for all the research ya'll did, I found it very humerous and intriguing. I'm not sure that I'll be taking action anytime soon, but at least I'll have a heads up on knowing what to do in case something ever came up, haha! I know that some of you are out and about right now, and you had better be using all this useful information to get some! *Ahem Andrew & Marc* Sorry I didn't hang out tonight, but I'm in Silverdale soo come back tomorrow and we'll go to the Bistro! Hahah okay peace out dudes!

quick note

2008-01-31T02:02:00.000-08:00

a quick side note to my soon-to-post blog about "booty calls"... all this talk about getting some is definitely not helping the fact that i need some because i want some at this point. or is it that i want some because i need some? rhetorical question, don't answer. again, this is just a side note since everyone else's posted blog is a novel long. not that i'm hating because i just don't have the right amount of time to divulge in such an amazing topic; however, i will when time suffices. how you like them apples? ;)

p.s. i miss all of you.

More Booty Call Rules

2008-01-30T21:08:00.000-08:00

10 Rules of the Booty Call:

The booty call couples the consistent coitus of a relationship with the no-strings-attached, comfortable-solo-sleeping of a one-night-stand.

If you've never been involved in a booty call relationship, it's worth trying out. Of course, it's easy to screw it up. One comment that accidentally shows some attachment or desire for a real date can INSTANTLY turn the other person off. Even the woman.

1) AVOID BRUNCH AT ALL COSTS

Brunch is the natural enemy of the booty call, like the mongoose to the snake or water to fire. UNDERSTAND: the booty call's got one purpose: Have relations. RECOGNIZE: Once you're done, you both need to get up, get dressed and get the hell out of there.

Booty calls can NOT, repeat CANNOT, turn into sleepovers. After one of those, there's only one place to go: Brunch. And that's a date. Which means: You're no longer involved in a booty call, you're dating.

2) DON'T SET A TIMETABLE

It's tempting, but you don't want to have your booty call scheduled for a regular night and time.- say, every Saturday night at 2:30 A.M.

Your hook ups need to stay uncomplicated, flexible and relaxed. If you get on a regular schedule, you might actually get BORED. If you both start working your Saturday nights around getting together late at night. At that point, you're treading in that dangerous almost-a-couple territory.

3) NO MEETING IN PUBLIC

You guys can't really spend time together in public. Part of having no strings attached means that you're not hanging out too much, or worse, developing a deeper bond.

NOTE: If you're out together too much, one of you might see the other one flirting with someone else and realize you can't deal with that. That means you'll have to call off the booty calling, because now, there's emotional baggage.

4) LOOK GOOD

Yes, the relations are basically guaranteed - and no, it's not a date - but you're still getting intimate with someone. You owe it to them to look and smell good. In a lot of ways, the booty call is about fulfilling a fantasy. Nothing ruins that like the other person showing up in tattered sweat pants or with a mysterious, foul body odor.

5) EXPECT NOTHING

Booty calls should only be made - and accepted - by people who want to get it on at that moment in time. So, if you call one Friday night and get the "I'm really tired" or "Not tonight" response, you shouldn't be upset. You're not allowed to expect anything of the other person.

ALSO: These sex-only arrangements almost always come to abrupt ends. So, if the other person stops calling you or accepting your calls don't take it personally. A no-strings-attached relationship is like a temp job; you have the opportunity to make a clean break, no questions asked, at any point. That's the part of the joy.

6) BE OPEN AND HONEST

What this means: Early on, you two need to establish that what you're doing is purely physical. If you do, that means no relationship talks later on.

(-Or, at least, if the other person brings up a relationship talk, you can end it by simply saying, "I thought we agreed this was just physical and that's all we were looking for.")

Once you guys reach the consensus that it's just a booty call, that will actually make things EASIER and more comfortable.

7) BE SAFE

It's 2006, protect yourself. There should be NO unprotected booty call relations.

If you do want to go unprotected, then you'll have to tell each other who else you're fornicating with - and that can lead to jealousy. PLUS, if the other person starts rattling off a long list, it will really kill the mood.

8) BE EXTREMELY GENEROUS

This is an unwritten rule...until now...but one you should abide by. Since you're both in it for sex, you both HAVE to do your best to give each other total fulfillment.

Don't just try to get yourself a climax. Make sure to take care of the other person too. Be extremely generous. That's the best way to keep the booty call alive for a long time. And you might as well...in a purely sexual relationship, you can do freakier stuff than you can do with someone you have to take home to your parents.

9) MIND YOUR TIMING

Make sure you both understand the time restrictions. Once blanket rule: No calls before 9:30 P.M. That's too early in the night; a booty call should basically be the last thing you do before you go to sleep. As for what time is too late...you'll need to feel that out. A good rule of thumb: Don't call more than an-hour-and-a-half after the bars in your city close. (-So, if most places close at 2:00 A.M., don't call later than 3:30 A.M.)

PS: Don't ever get upset if the other person doesn't pick up. They're allowed to be busy all night long.

10) FOLLOW ALL THE ABOVE RULES

from Yahoo 360 - Big T.'s blog

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more additions to the lists.

GETTIN IT:

Doin It // LL Cool J
Break You Off // The Roots
Hey Lover // LL Cool J
Addiction // Kanye West
Put It In Your Mouth // Akinyele
Go Deep // Janet
Smooth // D'Angelo
Wonderful // CunninLynguists
Slow Jamz // Kanye West
Play // David Banner
Sexy // Black Eyed Peas
Twisted // Keith Sweat
Lick // Joi

MIDNIGHT MIX:

Footsteps In the Dark // Isley Brothers
Rock the Boat // Aaliyah
Movin' Cool (The Afterparty) // OutKast
Protection // Massive Attack
Red Light Special // TLC
A Dream // Debarge
Brown Sugar // D'Angelo
The Velvet Rope // Janet
Love Song // 311
Again // Lenny Kravitz
One Evening // Feist
Smooth Operator // Sade
I Belong to You // Rome
Maybe // Johnny Gill
Instant Love // Leon Ware
Understanding // Xscape

I'm finding that the list will get pretty repetitive with the artists, so I'm going to start another list on the side that includes artists that make a lot of sex music. I'll start it:

D'Angelo
Prince
Feist
Sade
Lenny Kravitz
Barry Manilow
Al Green
Minnie Ripperton
Isley Brothers

ADD TO THE LIST Y'ALL!

oOh booty call

2008-01-29T21:01:00.000-08:00

A more updated version !

This pre-booty call agreement (hereinafter referred to as the "Agreement") is entered into on the _____day of __________, 2008, by_______________________, between ____________and______________.

THIS AGREEMENT SHALL COVER THE FOLLOWING RULES AND PRINCIPLES:

1. No sleeping over - unless it is very good and we need to repeat it in the morning.
2. No meeting in public except for dinner or drinks before the events of the evening.
3. No calls before 9 PM - we don't have shit to talk about.
4. None of that "lovemaking" shit - only sex allowed.
5. No emotional discussions (i.e. Where are we heading with this? Do you love me?) The answer is no, so don't ask.
6. No plans made in advance - that is why you are called the "backup," unless you are from out-of-town, then it's only a one-time advanced arrangement.
7. All gifts accepted - money is always good.
8. No baby talk - however, dirty talk is encouraged.
9. No asking for comparisons with former lovers - it's really none of your damn business.
10. No calling each other "friends with privileges" we are not friends, just sex buddies.
11. Calling out the wrong name during sex is OK - don't be offended.
12. No extra clothing - I don't want your ass leaving anything behind when you leave.
13. No falling asleep right after sex - it's over, so get your ass up, get dressed and go the fuck home.
14. Don't be offended if I don't ask if you enjoyed it - I don't care.
15. You cannot borrow my car for any reason.
16. If anyone asks who you are, the standard response will be: "My roommate's girlfriend/boyfriend."
17. Doggie style is the preferred position - the reason is less eye contact the better.
19. No condoms, no fucking. Carry your ass home.
20. Bring your own drink - I am not your liquor store.
21. No phone use, please - don't want anyone calling back looking for your ass.

* EXTRA TIP FOR SUCCESSFUL BOOTY CALLS: The aforementioned rules may only be altered by the holder of the agreement. If the other party attempts to change or alter any terms of this Agreement, it will automatically become null and void and you will then be removed from the BOOTY CALL LIST and deleted from phone memory and email list. In other words, you will be BLOCKED from all communications until your silly ass understands the rules.

Participating Party

Signature_______________________________________Date: ________________

Participating Party

Signature_______________________________________Date: ________________

Callin' All Booties!

2008-01-28T18:06:00.000-08:00

Alright.. the moment we have been waiting for, or well, the moment I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR. the topic of this blog is.. *drum roll*....

... the BOOTY CALL. ready? safety first, so buckle up.

Caution: this will be long, but I PROMISE each line is as important as the next..

So I did my homework and spent some time doing research on this topic since I have no experience in this field. What I have found is a lot of Rules and Regulations, which is important when taking on a booty call. But for us "noobs" out there, there was not very much information on Establishing a Booty Call. Therefore I have decided to dedicate this to the establishment. Now first, here are a few links that might help those in need of rules and regulations, and that I thought were actually a good and quick read..

- http://www.sosuave.com/halloffame/hall226.htm [for the guys]
- http://www.baddgrrl.com/bootycall.html [when to make it, when to take it]
- http://vixentales.blogspot.com/2005/08/booty-calls.html [for the women]
- http://mo.tribe.net/thread/26930c81-2b9c-4cbf-b3e8-c0e7ab67d2f7 [agreement form]

Now, although those are some good reads, I do have some opinions about a few things and will address them later.

Okay, so the real reason no one has talked about yet: The Establishment. now this information is merely based on perspective and personal opinion. NOT FACT. but comments are MORE THAN WELCOME :)

So to establish a booty call, I feel that starting with someone you know is probably a safe bet for the first round. Like any "relationship," I feel it is better to start with someone you are comfortable with and then move on to people you have just met, not literally just met of course. Why? You know how they are, you know they're history [sorta], and HOPEFULLY feel comfortable with their company. CAUTION: dealing with friends is risky also because if for some reason, which there should be no reason, feelings come into play, CUT IT OFF IMMEDIATELY. you should either establish that before or on your way to establishing the booty call.

Now, how do you ask? *whew* this one here is tough.. you obviously don't want to sound desperate, nor do I. There really is no easy way to do it, but to just come out and say it. Yeah I know, that's tough.. but hey, not everything in life is easy, right? I don't mean to literally just ask "So.. you wanna fuck?".. some may be okay with that, but it's hard to know if that's what they want as well. I suggest a quick meeting, say.. an afternoon snack at Starbucks or something. Now that does go against the rule of "keeping booty calls unplanned [see: backup plan]" because according to booty call rules, NO PLANS MADE IN ADVANCE.. meaning you meet, you fuck, you leave. simple as that. But I think establishing the FIRST call like this is probably the polite way to do it, making it short and simple also, typically with a normal opener ["how'd your day go so far..?"], also try and find out if they are in a relationship at the time, because you probably wouldn't want to intrude. Then move into the real reason you wanted to meet up..

"So I wanted to meet up with you to ask you something. You know I'm single, and I know you're single, and if you don't have any plans tonight, I was wondering if i could call you some time to come over and keep me company for a bit."

... now a line like this is good, because it states somewhat clearly what you are implying. If you are more comfortable with them, you can probably figure out an easier way than that, but I would go with something around that line. ALSO, that might be a good time to let them know..

"It's not that I'm romantically attracted to you, no offense, but I just enjoy your company and feel that you might be in the same headspace I'm in, and thought we might be able to help each other out."

[wow, am I really saying these things?! note to self: take notes from self.]

That right there should help clear the idea that this is the beginning of a BOOTY CALL. If they are that dumb to not figure that out, let them know. It is NOT WISE to go into a booty call without clearly stating it's a booty call. If you feel that it's not clear, but they still say yes, bring it up when they come over.. "You do understand that affection and feelings stay outside this room, right? this is just a booty call".. thats when you hand them the AGREEMENT FORM. haha..

From my perspective, I think that's probably the easiest, most polite way you can probably do it. Now, if a meeting isn't possible, I believe its A-OK to do it over the phone [texting, too]. Before meeting up, be somewhat sure that the callee [the person you ask] is looking for what you are looking for, in order to avoid rejection, if that is what you are most afraid of. If you're looking for some "booty" and they are too, chances are its a done deal. After the first night, it's all in your hands now, I'm only here to help establish. Like any other relationship, COMMUNICATION is ideal. MAKE SURE all rules and regulations are known between both parties. THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT. Of course changing rules is okay, as long as you both understand, which is my next subject.

Marc-James' Alterations to Rules and Regulations:
1. Sleeping over is a No No. With this, I think it should be okay, for the first time. First time is the worst time, so I think its neccessary to get used to the idea of having that person in the bed. BUT, that does not mean sleeping over is OK all the time. "Guest" should not sleep over unless asked by "Home Owner" or if it is welcomed.

2. No meeting in public. This rule is according to your preference. If it's a friend at first, that may be difficult. but later on, I suggest talking to one another about this is more polite.

3. No calls before 9pm. Booty calls are supposed to be after 9, but shit, if you want some during the day, and they can be there.. by all means!

4. No calling eachother friends. This is probably for the experienced booty calls. You know, when a booty call merely is JUST a sex buddy to you. I don't know but for me right now, it's kinda hard to get that through my head that I have someone who's not a friend, but just a piece of ass. But like I said, I'm new at this.

5. Doggy style preferred. This is interesting.. you know, so you don't make eye contact n' shit.. although I like this idea *wink* *wink*, any position is fair game as long as the lights are out.

So there you have it! REMEMBER, this is from MY perspective. I may edit this the next week or so, after comments and questions have been taken into account. I just wanted to get this out now because this topic has been up for grabs and everyone has been picking at it. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE leave feedback. AND, if you are interested in a booty call, my email is a click away ;) I'm not gonna lie, I'm single and I'm human.. HOLLA!

ps: If you get some after reading this, you owe me.

[marc]

so sexual, you'll need a smoke after this

2008-01-26T19:34:00.000-08:00

deng, these lists are real good so far.. i'll have enough baby-making music to start a whole new family of little marc's running around.. haha.. SYKE FOR REALS on the family thing. ya'll know im not lookin for that! shiiiitt.. but really. HELLA good stuff guys. alright, my turn to add some goodies! turn the lights down low and light some candles, cause its about to get hot n steamy!

"Gettin' It Mix" [no particular order]
112 // You Already Know
* Adina Howard // T-shirt And My Panties On
* Avant // Making Good Love
Jodeci // Freakin' You
Montel Jordan // Get It On Tonight
Mya // It's All About Me ft. Sisqo
Ne-Yo // Mirror
R. Kelly // Feelin' On Your Booty
Silk-E-Fyne // Romeo And Juliet
J. Holiday // Bed [remix] ft. Trey Songz
Usher // That's What It's Made For

"Midnight Mix" [no particular order]
Az Yet // Last Night
* Babyface // When Your Body Gets Weak ft. Az Yet
Genuwine // So Anxious
Keith Sweat // Nobody
Kevon Edmonds // Move It Slow
Ready For The World // Let Me Love You Down
Usher // Do It To Me
Boyz II Men // I'll Make Love To You
Marvin Gaye // Let's Get It On
* Maroon 5 // Secret
R. Kelly // Down Low ft. Robert Isley [oh shit! this is for that booty call ;) ]

* - suggested downloads

whew! i almost took myself to bed cause that list got so hot.. "uh uhhhh..." ..although i did suggest certain ones for DL, i also suggest just DLing them all if you don't got it. okay, now go make some babies! juuusst kidding.. just get some :)

[off topic] i don't know about cha'll.. but im ready for the next topic: rules and regulations for a Booty Call.

[marc]

Foreal? Foreal.

2008-01-26T14:17:00.000-08:00

Alright, I'm not sure what the playlists are about, but here are a few songs that I thought about.. I think most of 'em go under the category of "Gettin' It" but there are a few other ones in there too. I'll leave that up to ya'll. :)

Freak Like Me - Adina Howard
You're Making Me High - Toni Braxton
Freak Me - Silk
Meeting In My Bedroom - Silk [haha]
Stroke You Up - Changing Faces
Bump N Grind - R. Kelly
My Body - LSG
Body Bumping (Yippie Yi Yo) - Public Announcement
Come & Talk to Me - Jodeci
Knockin' The Boots - H-Town
I Wanna Know - Joe
Let's Chill - Guy
Love Jones - Maxwell
Between the Sheets - Isley Brothers
Anywhere - 112
Anatomy 1 on 1 - Mya
So Far To Go - J Dilla
Turn Your Lights Down Low - Bob Marley & Lauryn Hill
Bed - J.Holiday
Lately - Tyrese
Nice & Slow - Usher
Bedtime - Usher
On Top Of You - Enrique Iglesias
Time To Have Sex - Cobra

Okay so maybe that wasn't just a few.. but I kept remembering/finding good ones. I'm sure one of you guys will make a boot knockin cd pretty soon so you can thank me later, haha! Anyway..

REAL TALK though forreaaal. Seeing that these songs pertain to one thing - and nobody has posted a subject or question yet - here's it is straight up: Booty Calls; the Rules & Regulations. I'm curious to know!

<3 Sheena

The Playlists

2008-01-25T02:14:00.000-08:00

oy

we're gonna have TWO different lists to add to:

The Get It Mix ("handle business" Sex tracks)
and
The Midnight Mix (slower tempo Love Making music)

make sure you label your posts. i'll compile master lists as we build on.

i'll start this with a couple of tracks no one has mentioned thus far.

Get It Mix
Slum Village // Count the Ways
SWV // Can We?
Feist // Inside and Out
Janet // That's the Way Love Goes
Floetry // Say Yes (Remix)
Tank // My Body
Usher // Twork It Out
112 // Anywhere
Ginuwine // Tell Me Do U Wanna
Ginuwine // Only When Ur Lonely
Teddy Pendergrass // Close the Door

Midnight Mix
Justin Timberlake // Set the Mood Right [Prelude]
Aaliyah // One In a Million
Minnie Ripperton // Inside My Love
Dwele // My Lova
SWV // Rain
Kool & the Gang // Summer Madness
The Dream // Falsetto
Choklate // Love It
Donnell Jones // I Wanna Luv You
Aaliyah // Come Over (feat. Tank)
Robin Thicke // I Need Love

microphone check one, two - what is this?

2008-01-22T03:12:00.000-08:00

howdy do.

(let me know if you need help setting things up. i'll most likely show you how to use this in person.)

<3